"And they overcame him [the devil] by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death." (Revelation 12:11, KJV)
This song is very dear to me due to my testimony. Back in 2001, the Lord led me to go on a 40-day fast. He gave me drink only water or juice as needed until 6pm each day and conclude each day with one balanced meal for 40 days. Little did I know that the 40th day of the fast would conclude with my being in Nashville, TN for Donnie McClurkin's "Back to Holiness" Conference. At the live recording, Khesha Becton & Friends introduced this song. The song was so powerful, all I could do was kneel in the isle and tremble and weep as the Lord ministered to me. It seemed that as she sang, God was completing the final mental, emotional and spiritual healing which He started back in 1996. December 23, 1996 was suppose to have been my last day on earth. I was gay and tired of struggling between my salvation and "romantic orientation". One evening, every hurt, pain and rejection that I had ever experienced in life, all came together against me. In that moment of darkness, I felt that suicide was my only way to end the struggle and stop the pain so that I could never be hurt again. I was so far gone in my mind that I was not even thinking of my two sons that I loved dearly and who were ages 6 and 4 at the time. As I was about to carry out the act of ending my life, God spoke through the darkness, stood my sons before me as clear as day and said, "They deserve to have their daddy". The darkness broke and I came back to my right mind. However, I was torn and broken and did not know what to do. I could no longer deny I was same-gender-loving (gay) nor could I deny that I was saved, and loved the Lord as much as I knew how. God sent me back to the scriptures and gave me to study in context, all of the scriptures that are taken out of context to judge and condemn gay people. As I studied, I begin to see that none of those scriptures had anything to do with love, monogamy and commitment -- God began to heal me and put me back together piece by piece until finally, I was healed and understood what it meant to truly be "made whole". I was no longer afraid or ashamed of any part of me. Out of this experience, God caused me to experience His love, mercy and grace in a way I never thought possible. He also gave me a greater humility and compassion for people which caused His anointing on my life to increase. As I knelt in the isle weeping, God used Khesha Becton and this song to minister the final healing. After the conference, I heard that the CD containing this song would be released at next year's conference. Needless to say, I was not able to attend the conference to obtain the CD. I searched off and on for eight years praying that God would bless me to find the song. Finally, I was connected with someone who did attend the conference, had the CD and shared the song with me. This song has become my theme song for my online outreach to LGBT Christians such as myself.
The site contains most of the information resulting from my studies as I was reconciling my "romantic orientation" with my salvation. It also contains links to other sites that deal with this issue. I pray that it blesses you.
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to this song nor do I receive any monetary gain from sharing. I share this song simply for the edification of the Body of Christ and to help promote the artist, Khesha Becton.
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